five months

Time is slipping away from me. Eliza turned five months old a week ago. I just have not found the opportunity to sit down at my computer in a while. With Will getting his wisdom teeth taken out and my mom coming in last week, these past two weeks have been a bit busy. I can hardly believe it is almost Thanksgiving, goodness. Hopefully I can find the time to do a bit of a life update at some point, but any free time will likely be spent finishing up my assignments for graduate school.

Here is what Eliza is up to at five months:

* Lets just get it out of the way, she is still not sleeping. I still have moments where I think I can not handle another night/day of constantly trying to get her to sleep, but I like to think I am handling it better. I still think she is up roughly 3-5 times a night, but I pretty much have stopped counting. She at least is giving us some decent napping days. I get really worn out the days where she won't sleep longer than twenty minutes, its just a lot of work!

* She is rolling all over the place. She has made her way across our living room by rolling. She is pushing up on her arms and can scoot herself backwards. I am afraid she may crawl before she can sit up. 

* She is generally happy most of the time, unless her sleep deprivation catches up to her. I can barely get enough of her smile. It is just the greatest.

* She had some trouble gaining weight earlier this month, which left me even more stressed out. We tried to feed her even more than what I was and give her formula free of allergens. She hated the formula and I grew exhausted from constantly feeding her. I also cut out wheat after this appointment thinking that she may have an allergy to that as well. So I have been gluten and dairy free for a month now. We still do not see much of a difference in her behavior, but she is gaining weight now. I am beginning t othink she may not have an allergy any more, but I am too nervous to introduce dairy and gluten again. 

* She lets Madison treat her like a rag doll. It is amazing the affection Eliza already has towards Madison. I think younger siblings are born worshiping the older ones.

* She really is most content when she is cuddling with me or Will. She enjoys being close to us much more than Madison ever did and often spends most of the night in bed with us. Even though, I get frustrated that she does not sleep in her bed all night, I am thankful for the closeness. I know how quickly those snuggles come to an end. 

* She has discovered her voice and ability to makes noises. She has started to blow bubbles with her lips. She is giggling a lot. She has tickle spots that really get her  giggle going. It is the start of being able to really interact with her. 

Even though this month we were thrown another little curve ball in regards to Eliza's well-being, we are still hanging in there. I think I am just growing more and more comfortable handling both children. I still run out of steam most days, but I am able to handle having a kid to tend to all day every day. I am learning to really let go of any remaining desire to be selfish with my time, I just have to save all my time alone for the weekends. 

I can feel we are in the home stretch now. Eliza is nearly six months old which is the start of them gaining some independence. She will be able to sit up, crawl, then walk, all of which allows them to be a little less frustrated and helpless. I am just thankful I get to experience every moment of my children's life, even if I can barely see straight from exhaustion.

I think if Eliza gets any cuter, I might just eat her up. I reach a point every day where I can hardly handle the love I have for her and Madison, its just too much.