Still Waiting...

I had read it several times that a baby's due date is better referred to as a guess date. This is to help an expectant mother mentally adjust to the idea that baby might not come exactly on that magical date. However, I took this to me, she should come early. Of course, not too early, but just early enough for me to feel like I received an early present and could miss out on the remainder of the waiting period. My due date is tomorrow. Which means there is most likely no early present for me.

I went to the doctor and had my membranes swept on Monday, a fairly uncomfortable procedure, that would surely cause me to see my doctor at 3 am the next morning. Tuesday morning came and went. Now I am here, just sitting. I have had what I think to be contractions, but those decide to only come every ten minutes for the past two days. There will be a few little stinkers that come every five minutes, but then quickly fade back into every ten minutes. Today they seem to be a bit stronger than yesterday, but still only ten minutes apart. My hope is that when active labor starts, I will be super warmed up and the baby will fly right out. So far all of my hopes have not played out.

I am frustrated because every day I feel defeated that another day came and went with no baby. I am stuck in a strange place of feeling beyond ready to give birth, feeling as if it really is never going to happen, and a feeling of apprehension about what the heck are we going to do with a baby.

I know that the birth with come and go and before I know it I will have a five year old, so I do not want to rush this time. It is just a waiting game that I am not very good at playing.